Okaeri
by lil kagome 15
Summary: I screamed out the name of somone who just moments before saved my life. 2I watched as the world around slowly grew duller and myself more weary. I watched as all the peaple 3My heart seemed to explode as I looked into those eyes so long ago i'd been capt
1. I: Black as my Color

**Title: **Okaeri

**Authoress: **lil kagome

**Summary: **Deathe is inevitable, but what happens when deathe is given before it is time. Misao isn't able to give up... and yet she already has.

**Warning's: **No warnings are present at this time. But I heed a warning, this is rated T and has some strong laungauge and some situations insinuated not suitable for children under the age of thirteen. Of course I can turn no reader away, but I am obligated to warn you.

**Couplings: **AxM and some mild KxK, also might add in some SxM.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin… If I did I wouldn't be writing this fic. So why don't you e-mail me if you own it… I'd 'love' to buy it from you. lol _Lawyers… Don't sue me!_

**A/N: **I just started this out of boredom so please no send flames... if you do wish to flame me... do it politely please.

**Chapter title: **Black as my color

**XXXXX**

**Okaeri: I**

**Black as my color**

Darkness covered the forest around us, hiding all that may have loomed near our hiding spot. A whimper escaped my lips as once more I felt around for my kunai, but to no avail. I closed my eyes and strained to hear any movement around me.

'Snap'

The sound sent shivers down my spine and I held my breathe in a desperate attempt to not be found. My heart stopped as a hand was placed on my shoulder. I imagined the cold dead hand of a stiff, but when I turned I found only the much colder gaze of Aoshi.

I let out a long breath and brought my hand to my chest. "Kami! You scared me Aoshi-sama!" My voice was weak as I got to my feet.

"Gomen nasai. We must hurry though, the hitokiri are fast aproaching!" I nodded, my mind numb with fear. "Misao-chan!" Omasu rang out from her spot on the ground. Her eyes seemed trans-fixed on somthing behind myself and Aoshi. "Aoshi-sama, look out!" Her voice hung eriely in the air.

I heard the clashing of metal upon metal, and faintly I saw the glint of Aoshi's kodachi's. "Get out of here!" Aoshi screamed as the sound of thunder broke my trance. I shook my head slowly, but at the firm pull of Omasu's hand I reluctantly took a step back. '_What if he doesn't come back this time?_' The thought was lost as lightning lit up the clearing.

"Come on Misao-chan!" Once more Omasu whimpered and I turned stopping only for a brief moment before sprinting off, pulling a very frightened Omasu behind me. I halted as I heard a crack which could not possibly have been from the thunder.

"Well, well, it seems we've found ourselves a distraction." There were grumbles of aproval from many of the men surrounding the area. "Leave us be!" Omasu yelled in desperation. "Gomen, I just can't do that, you see. Boss told us to capture the one known as Misao and bring her as bait for 'Shinomori'." I growled at his lack of formalities. How dare he even say Aoshi's name!

My hand grabbed onto Omasu in a re-assuring grasp. She nodded and backed away. "Hey, where're you goin'?" The tallest of the men asked as Omasu fled the scene. "You want me correct?" I watched as they nodded, and I smirked. "You'll have to catch me first." I did a backflip turning directiona and heading the oposite way.

My heart raced as I made it to the edge of the river. Where was I to go now? "So the chase come to an end." A stout man proclaimed and fear started to settle into my bones. He stood before me in a matter of seconds, looking me up and down. "I'm sure the boss wouldn't mind if I had a little fun before bringing yer' on in." My head raced with possibilities as he stepped closer. Too close!

I looked around me but found nothing in my reach. He reached out his hand touching my cheek with a hand as cold as ice. "Don't touch her!" My head darted to the direction of the voice.

Aoshi! My heart sang at this realization, and I found myself wanting to jump in joy, but unfortunately the narrow bank wouldn't permit that. "Ah! So this is the formidable Aoshi?" A young man probably around twenty-two replied not too far from where I stood.

He was a rather un-even man; one shoulder seemingly higher than the other. His cold black eyes bore into my soul as he looked me up and down. His hair was spiked and messy, falling wherever it landed upon hs head. "Toshi-sama, I beleive you were just escourting our little friend here to the HQ." He said gesturing to me.

"No, I beleive he was just going to let her go, or i'd kill him!" Came the thick, booming, deep, voice of Aoshi. I could hardly see as Aoshi came charging at the younger man. "You'll die!" Screamed a woman I only had just noticed off in the distance. My heart raced at the thought of Aoshi dieing.

The clashing of kodachi to blade made my heart shudder in fear. Even as the man before me fell, and even as Aoshi asked me if I was injured I did not move. I saw the eyes of the woman, her eyes glowing as a cat's often does. I saw the flicker of a grin, the lone tear, and I heard the snap of the bow. Even as it raced for me I was held fast.

My eyes grew wide as Aoshi jumped in front of me falling into the river with a large splash. "No!" My heart felt as if it were going to burst open at any second. The woman simply cackled as she advanced toward me. "'Tis a shame really... He was a cute one." She said and my fists balled instantly. Before I could make another move the woman fell.

Her eyes became big, her mouth gaped in confusion. As she took her last breath I screamed. I screamed out the name of somone who just moments before saved my life. I called... Called for Aoshi. The only answer I recieved was the bloody water, and one lone kodachi.

My head hung low as I sat up in my-just seconds before-bed. It was the past yes... But that past haunted my life with every shadow therefore granted upon me. My life had come to such a quick stop as we lost the one known as Aoshi. No tears have took shelter in my eyes since before that fateful night. back then I could cry... Back then I had a reason to... A reason to feel.

I shifted, standing up as I straightened my yakuta. My heart was lost since that night... And forever it shall be. I changed quickly, wanting to get an early start on all the work I was going to do today. I took two steps out of my room and then...

'Bam!'

Kamiya Kaoru almost ran me over! "Oh... Sorry Misao! Have you seen Kenshin-sama today?" I shook my head and she nodded in acknowledgement huffing as she walked down the small hall. It was now six months after the 'incident'. As Sanoske likes to call it. Six very long, very hurtful months.

I sighed as I once more came before the stone. The stone that represented a life... and a deathe. "How long has it been?" I sqeaked out my small voice quivering as I kneeled before a rock... A rock that somehow brought me a world of pain.

Jiya-or rather Okina- had offered we not put it where I would see it every day, but I would not hear of such a thing. He deserved to be in a place of honor... Now he had that. I ran my hand across the cold stone wanting to somehow feel a remnant of his warmth. Somehow get a glimpse of that smile.

I looked down at the kodachi riding on my hip. I had never had the the heart to put it up. After all it was a good weapon. My head spun as I looked at this monument, a shrine to my once, and forever more love. "Time seems to have just slipped away."

**XXXXX**

My eyes stared blankly at the paper I was supposed to be studying. Was this what my life had come to? I was now the Okashira of the Oniwaban-shu... Was that not what I wanted? My eyes scanned over the report again and I couldn't help but to sigh. I looked around the room I now called my office. It was painted purely in black, covering the once happy times this room had held.

I looked down at my clothes, they were black as well... Some would say it was because of my being a ninja, but I knew... I knew all too well that it was my way of crying for him. I had to turn into a stoic shell of the person I was just to go on... And yet this was my only remembrance of him. I felt the sting of a tear behind my eye but it quickly went away and I sighed once more.

"Black as my color I swear i'll never forget you Aoshi-sama!" She said her voice trembling with the sadness only few could detect. Just as the sun began to set along the horizon she turned to look out the window, slowly watching as day became night, and memories once more filled her mind.

**XXXXX**

**A/N: **hope you all liked my first chapter... and you know what... if you want to make me write faster and be happy... R&R


	2. II: Darkness as my Haven

**Title: **Okaeri

**Authoress: **lil kagome

**Summary: **Deathe is inevitable, but what happens when deathe is given before it is time. Misao isn't able to give up... and yet she already has.

**Warning's: **No warnings are present at this time. But I heed a warning, this is rated T and has some strong laungauge and some situations insinuated not suitable for children under the age of thirteen. Of course I can turn no reader away, but I am obligated to warn you.

**Couplings: **AxM and some mild KxK, also might add in some SxM.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin… If I did I wouldn't be writing this fic. So why don't you e-mail me if you own it… I'd 'love' to buy it from you. lol _Lawyers… Don't sue me!_

**A/N: **I just started this out of boredom so please no send flames... if you do wish to flame me... do it politely please.

**Chapter title: **Darkness is my haven

**XXXXX**

**Okaeri: II**

**Darkness is my haven**

I sat before the stone in the darkness I found so many memories in. The cold air didn't seem to touch me as I was even colder myself. The laughter from deep within the Aoi-ya only brought me more sadness I was yet so unable to touch it myself. The moon seemed to shine down upon me, mocking me as the clouds slowly rolled in. My eyes drifted to the trees not too far away... There I was greeted by one of the worst memories ever.

**-F-**

"Jiya!" I screamed as I clapsed from shere exhaustion. I hadjust run four miles and my whole body ached as I retched from my spot on the ground. "Misao! Why did you go out there again?"I just looked up,my hair falling in front ofmy eyes. "He could still be out there! We can't just give up!"I shook asI said this and Okina just looked down atme-his grandaughter. "He's gone Misao... give it up before you are too." She saw the tears in Okina's eyes and her stomache once more clenched. "I... can't! I just can't give up on him!" She cried and then she realized what he meant... There was somthing dangerous that had wanted him...

**-F-**

I stood at the edge of those woods I had gone to every night for two weeks. Was I right in giving up? Was I cowardly for doing so? My heart seemed to be torn into a thousand pieces... And I didn't want it to be mended. I didn't want anothers love, for no love is as great as the one I have lost.

Darkness now covered the land around me... Shrouding my body and the vision of somthing that I only vageuly remember. My own words hung in the air as I closed my eyes and listened for the familiar sounds of crickets and the roudy men in the town. I found no sounds and I slowly felt my legs give out beneathe me. What was going on? Why was I falling?

My body felt so light as I lay on the ground the world surrounding me only in a faint mist. I could no longer feel the earth beneath me as I called out in my own mind. "lies are in the mist of truth... you must remember Misao... just try." The voice was so far off. I didn't understand what it was asking me to do. "Who are you?" I asked and no answer came.

I felt two very large hand's shaking me as I woke. "Weasel! Wake up!" Sanoske pleaded and my eyes slowly opened. "Wh-What happened?" I asked looking up at the face of a very worried Sanoske. "I was just going to ask you that..." I saw the worry fill his eyes as I winced. Somthing on my side was hurting, it wasn't till I looked down did I realize that there was a dagger stuck in my side, peircing the tender flesh.

"Oh god!" Sanoske screamed as he saw the pool of blood. "Megumi!" He screamed and I shook my head slightly trying to sit up. "It's not as bad as it-" I was cut off as a sharp pain raced through my chest. "Lay back down." He pushed me back onto the ground and I heard footsteps coming closer. "Megumi! She's been stabbed!"

Megumi just looked down at me in somthing between shock and horror. " Can you carry her inside?" She asked Sanoske and he nodded picking me up bridal style as I winced in pain again.

As we came inside I got many looks of horor and fear... and some of anger. I hated pity! Especiealy toward myself! Nothing was wrong... I'd live through this just as I had lived through losing Aoshi. My eyes closed as Megumi put the cloriform over my face.

Once more I was in the woods searching for my lost kunai, only hoping not to be killed. How rash and selfish a thought! I felt the hand, heard the scream, and watched the fiight. It went on like this for some time...

My dream never seemed to end as I went through the week after he had been lost. I watched as the world around slowly grew duller and myself more weary. I watched as all the peaple around me gave me lookes of pity. Oh how I only wish I could smile, but that was an ability long since forgotten. I watched myself change, and somehow close up.

My head pounded as I first felt the bed beneath me. I mildly wondered how long i'd been lying there, for my body felt stiff and ached as I went to sit up. "Misao-chan! You mustn't move!" Omasu scolded, but I took no heed and sat up to gaze at my surroundings.

"Misao?" It was Jiya who adressed me as I sat so carelessly on my bed. "Yes, Okina." I replied not having any tone to my voice. "It is time we have a talk." I was stunned that he actually had a serious look on his face as he adressed me this time. I looked up at him nodding and signaling Omasu to leave.

As the shoji shut behind her Jiya sat in chair before me. "Misao... There is someone after you, someone I used to know very well." I gestured him to continue and he sighed as he did so. "It is best that you go back with the Kenshin-gumi." I did not protest, nor did I agree, I simply sat there my head hanging low thinking about Aoshi. Why would someone want me... I mean hadn't they already succeded in taking Aoshi away from me?

He looked at me with heavy lids and tear stained cheeks, his eyes no longer thier crystal mockingness that normally succeded in making me flinch. "You leave tomorrow." Was all he said and I was left in the darkness of my room, and yet, I liked it better that way.

**XXXXX**

My headwas clouded with thoughts of him lately. Why was it hurting so bad? Was it because I could only faintly remember his face... Was it only because I couldn't remember why he meant so much to me? Love? Was that the word I so often used in my thoughts of him?

The darkness seemed to have all but changed to me, now more vivid, and vibrant in colors. It seemed to surround me wherever I went casting a shadow over me. It seemed all that was left in my life was the darkness, the cold, dreary feeling now etched permanently into my heart and soul.

I shifted in my spot, trying desperately to find a comfortable position. It wasn't the same, Tokyo just didn't offer as much solace as before, before when I at least knew he was alive.

I heard a qiet knock at my door and I offered a quick 'come in'. Kaoru walked in and looked around the room for some sort of light. "It's not right to always be in the dark." She said as she lit a candle on the small table in the corner of the room. "I like the dark." I replied and her mouth pulled into a firm line.

She seemed to be thinking somthing over as she sat at the edge of where I lay. "Did they ever find Aoshi's body?" The qeustion just seemed to fall from Kaoru's mouth not bothering to think upon the words being used.

All at once my mask lifted as my expression turned to a scowl. I looked at the window watching the moon as it shone brightly over the Aoi-ya. "No... But the amount of blood-" I cut myself off and shook my head to stop the tears that threatened to fall.

"You said he was shot with an arrow didn't you? I mean... he wouldn't have bled that wuch would he?" My head shot up at her qeustion. "Yes... But I mean he had been fighting all night... I just assumed he had gotten injured earlier." I paled as I thought of the possibilities she was bringing to the surface of my mind.

"Well, anyways Misao, it's not right to just give up on your own life because somone you cared for died. Don't you think he would have wanted you to be happy?" Misao just couldn't take this, it just wasn't fair! She didn't know how it felt! She didn't know the sleepless nights or the pain that sometimes made her want to die.

A figure came to stand in the doorway looking down at both the women talking about such a touchy subject. "Don't you think Misao should be happy Kenishin-sama?" Kaoru asked the red-headed by-stander. "Oro?" Was his only answer. I had to fight myself not to laugh, he just would never understand would he?

"Misao-san isn't sad, she's in denial that she is." I gaped, was it not enough that they come in _my_ room. They had to try and annalyze me now too? My eyebrow twitched as I stared at two friends who had the thought in thier minds that they were phyciatrist's annalyzing some crazy.

"I'm not in denial." I said looking back out the window to watch as clouds drifted over the moon causing it to be hidden from view. '_lies are in the mist of truth._' It sounded so faint, yet I heard it so clear.

"Sorry Kenshin-sama, Kaoru-sama, but I think i'm going to get some sleep now." My voice was laced with somthing else... Was it... Worry? "Of course Misao-chan" Said Kaoru mocking me from beneath her long eyelashes.

As the door shut behind them I fell once more into thought about Aoshi and my recent incident with the stabbing. The blackness engulfed my body in a comfort I had not in a long time known. But as the rain started to fall and as the thunder started to lull me to sleep I found myself falling once more into the mist.

"Misao-chan! Please don't forget! I'm still here!" The words were pleading and I found myself calling out a name I could only faintly here. "No! You must remember Misao-chan! The role of being a ninja! Every man for himself... Please just give up." My heart seemed to shudder at these words.

"I can't!" I screamed as I sat up abrupt in bed. I felt somthing wet touch my hand and noticed that I was crying. I hadn't cried in six months... How could this be? My eyes scanned the room, but I found nothing. Was it all just a dream? The words seemed so real. Was it just my imagination trying to play tricks on me. Surely it could not be...

**XXXXX**

I stood in the dojo, not knowing what to do. The darkness around me covered all the tears I had cried in the past hour of sitting here. I once more looked down to the kodachi riding so safely on my hip. Why had I kept it? Could there be any deeper meaning to it...

The darkness of night seemed to shadow my fear as I stood in the middle of the dojo. "Please come back to me." The words made me frown as I walked slowly to the shoji. I couldn't have just gone crazy could I? Iie! I know what I heard!

The darkness covered my body as I lay in my room. Darkness... There seemed to be a lot of it lately. But I think I liked it better that way. It made me feel closer to him, and I needed that.

"Darkness has become my haven." The words cast into the night a deeper meaning.I was going to find the light if it was the last thingI did! It's only fair forme to give back somthing once taken away.

**XXXXX**

**A/N: **So another chapter done and past. What do you think? R&R please.

**IMPORTANT: **I need a Beta Reader, anyone interested in the job please PM me... Also I will tell you there is a lot of OOCness in this story, as you may have noticed. So if you don't like the way the story line is heading please tell me in your reviews... Until next time... lilkagome


	3. III: Stolen Light

**Title: **Okaeri

**Authoress: **lil kagome

**Summary: **Deathe is inevitable, but what happens when deathe is given before it is time. Misao isn't able to give up... and yet she already has.

**Warning's: **No warnings are present at this time. But I heed a warning, this is rated T and has some strong laungauge and some situations insinuated not suitable for children under the age of thirteen. Of course I can turn no reader away, but I am obligated to warn you.

**Couplings: **AxM and some mild KxK, also might add in some SxM.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin… If I did I wouldn't be writing this fic. So why don't you e-mail me if you own it… I'd 'love' to buy it from you. lol _Lawyers… Don't sue me!_

**A/N: **I just started this out of boredom so please no send flames... if you do wish to flame me... do it politely please.

**Chapter Title: **Stolen light

**XXXXX**

**Okaeri: III**

**Stolen Light**

Time flew by as I worked, I had been helping Kenshin clean for over three hours now and was getting rather frustrated at the outcome. It seemed that all my efforts were in veighn as I fought to clean the dirty clothes Yahiko had brought me to clean. "That boy can definately attract the dirt." I mused as I finished the last of his laundry.

"Hey weasel!" Sanoske said as he threw a pile of clothes at me. I huffed and started once more the never ending task. Megumi had come by three days in a row just to check that my wound was healing properly. Although I figured that she was just there to see Sanoske. I sighed as my fingers once more slowly became numb. The suds flew up as I threw a pile into the water covering my face and arms. Honestly! I didn't know how Kenshin did it!

Tonight was the second anniversary of Kenshin's coming here, and I could only geuss that Kaoru was planning a party. It was kind of funny if you think about it. We all knew that Kenshin and Kaoru would get together in the end, it was just an unsaid law.

It was hard to believe that just seven months ago I had held much the same feelings for Aoshi. It used to be so easy to invision what our children would look like, now I had problems just remembering what he looked like.

I stopped scrubbing as I once more felt the urge to cry. Iie! I wouldn't do it again! I sank to my knees in pain and sorrow. Why did the only good thing in my life get stolen so easily?

I heard the faint tapping of a boot to wood and I looked up. Who was it? Kenshin was in the kitchen, and Kaoru and Yahiko went to town, and Sanoske was pre-occupied with Megumi. So who would be in the dojo?

My heart pounded as the shoji moved sligtly from across the room. I held my breathe as the door opened ever so slightly revealing to me a man with black hair and ice blue eyes. My heart stopped to see the walking dead stand before me, but at the same time he was alive, only living in my heart a lie. 'Doushite?' Was the only comprehendable thought in my mind at that moment.

It took me a moment to react to the sudden intrusion. Was this some kind of a sick joke my mind once more chose to torment me with? My heart seemed to eplode as I looked into those eyes so long ago i'd been captivated by. This couldn't be real! He was dead... wasn't he?

"Misao-san... There is much we need to cover... Come." His eyes were cold, his voice and expression unmoving, this had to be Aoshi. He looked me up and down and only shook his head. Once more I had been dressed in all black, but now it seemed they didn't fit at all. I didn't move as he crossed the room over to me.

I looked up at the one I once loved more than anything else in the world, and I didn't see anything significent in him. Was this the cost of letting go? I looked at a man I no longer knew, only hoping not to prove that he was the one I once loved. "Do you not recognise me?" His voice seemed horse and laced with somthing I had not once heard come from his mouth, pain.

"Why have you come back Aoshi-sama? Is it not enough that you broke my heart once? Are you here to do it again?" His eyes flashed with somthing akin to guilt as I stared into his pale blue eyes. "I have not come to break anything... I have come to warn you of a danger that may lurke in your path." He said simply and I frowned at his explanation.

"If you hadn't already known, I had an attempt on my life a week ago Aoshi-sama." My voice was strong, and yet unfeeling as I made the statemet to him. "I know, but there are worse things than that, that now may happen."

"Why should you care! You left me _again _Aoshi-sama! How could you do that?" If I had been my old self it would have sounded as I was whining, but instead it came out angry and loud as I reprimanded one who might have done that to me before.

The hurt in his eyes was clear as he frowned down at me. "I see much has changed Misao-san." His voice was smooth, but you could clearly hear some regret flowing through his words. He looked down at her covered in water, soaked black clothing, her eyes aflame with pain, and anger. His eyes scanned the surroundings noting that she had been doing laundry.

"Much _has changed_ Aoshi-sama, Including the fact that I believed in you! You took my life away!" My eyes seemed to bore into him as he looked down at a very broken version of myself. It only seemed to enhance the feeling of anger as he looked at me with pitying eyes. How dare he! I wasn't about to let him make me cry. My eyes filled with tears as I looked at him.

"Misao-san... I needed to stay away from you, if I hadn't you'd be dead by now." His eyes held sadness as he said those cruel but honest words to me. "I'd rather be dead than my heart be torn." My word's seemed to stun him as I said thim with such venom. '_It was never puppy love._' My words seemed to echo in my mind, but never escaped my lips.

He simply stood there looking at me, his stoic personality all but covering any emotion. "Misao, I came to try and protect you from them, I came to make sure it wouldn't all have been in vieghn." His words hung stiff in the air as I glared at him through my deep green eyes.

"I don't need protected..." '_I need loved..._' my mind continued but I didn't say it. "Time does strange things to peaple, including making them stronger, I suppose that's hard for you to believe though. That one so weak, can overcome fear in order to gain strengthe." His eyes widened at the words, he knew exactly what she was speaking of. When had she become so bright? He thought as he faintly smiled down at Misao.

"What are you smiling at?" I asked my eyes scanning over him, looking at the one man to irk me so. He aparently hadn't noticed he was smiling and his eyes widened yet again. "You certainly have lost your gaurd." I said simply my eyes narrowing as he came nearer to me.

"And you certainly have gained some malice." He retorted putting his hand to my shoulder pulling me up to stand before him. My eyes scanned his, my heart broke as I found only regret in those deep baby blues. My eyes filled with tears and my glare faded away. "You left me again Aoshi-sama... You left me all alone again." My tears fell freely now and he simply whiped them away with the palm of his hand.

"I know." Was his simple answer, I smiled, he always was a man of few words. He didn't pull me close, didn't try to comfort, and I found myself falling into my past, into a time where nothing else was needed but to hear his voice. And yet it was better than the pain of never knowing if he were alive or dead.

"Come... We've much to cover." Were his simple words as he pulled me into the kitchen. I heard a tiny sqeuk, and saw Kaoru's wide eyes. "We... You... A-Aoshi?" Her voice echoed through the room making Kenshin, Sano, and Yahiko turn thier heads to look over the new-or rather old- intruder. He nodded simply at all thier looks of astonishment, if not anger.

My head pounded with the oncoming headache as they all smiled and gave many greetings. How could they be so calm? My ears were ringing from all the excitement. I slammed my fist down onto a table in order to get everyone's attention. "Excuse me! But I believe it's time I talk to Aoshi-sama... ALONE!" She screamed the last part making Sano, and Yahiko jump in fright.

"Of course." Said Kaoru leaving the room, and guiding with her the now petrified Sano, and Yahiko. "Come on Yahiko-CHAN" She prodded and he turned around squinting at her. "What did you say busu?" He said and once more they started bickering.

I stood in front of the window, just simply gazing out at all the world ever was; dark. My eyes looked over my shoulder at Aoshi standing near the doorway, watching me from behind those ice blue eyes. "We just never seem to stay together do we?" I asked my smile sad, and yet true to my feelings.

"Misao I cannot say I didn't do it on purpose... but if I hadn't..." He halted, his eyes scanning mine. "Aoshi-sama, I never once faultered in my feelings, why wouldn't you understand that without you my life was but a bleak ray of light trying desperately to fend off the shadow's life casts upon me." My eyes sparkled and he looked down at me, his mouth pursed.

I looked at the window again, watching as the sun finally made it's plunge into the horizin. I sighed and looked back at him. "What's it like? Knowing you can come back to somthing?" I asked her eyes scanning his perfectly chiseled features for any sign of an emotion. "It's hard... knowing that if you come back you'll be ruining the memory you left behind, tarnishing the last part of you they were left to hold onto." He said his eyes cold as ever.

"Aoshi-sama..." I stopped running my hands over the now chilled sill of the window. "That night... I almost died, you were the one who had killed the woman weren't you?" I asked my eyes looking up to him in somthing more than curiosity.

He looked down at me, his eyes clouded with some unknown emotion. "Yes, I was." He answered simply and I sighed looking back out the window, to stare into the blackness of oblivion, that somehow had grown to envelope, and resemble in part; my life.

**-F-**

Aoshi stood panting on the bank of the small river. He watched as Misao stood frozen to her attacker, but he was too quick. He threw a kunai at the woman, sending her falling to the ground, dead in the matter of seconds.

He listend as Misao called out to him, her sob's echoing in his brain as her watched her, his pain growing as she looked to the water. He knelt down, letting go one of hos kodachi, maybe a momento, he didn't know, but he thought to leave her some small paice of him. He sighed as she whimpered, holding it in her small hands, her eyes staring at the red water.

She called, and sobed and she pleaded to Kami-sama for him to be ok, and all he could do was watch, watch her lose sight of the only light that ever brightened her world; her Aoshi-sama.

**-F-**

I sat in bed, listening to the sound of rain pitter pattering across the roof of the dojo, it was almost lulling in a sense as I stared at the ceiling, thinking upon the being sleeping just on the other side of one of these thin walls.

'tap, tap'

The sound was anything but sudden, and I sat up abruptly calling out a quick come in to whoever it was. To my surprise it was the very object of my thoughts. He stepped in, his eyes gazing at the dark room. "Did you need somthing Aoshi-sama?" I asked, but in an instant my words stopped as he...

**XXXXX**

**A/N: **lol, I know, I know you all hate cliffies, but I have plans... so just hang on k? lol, R&R peaple, I know you know what i'm talking about... lol, so push the little button and make my day all that more brighter.

luv ya all,

lilkagome


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